Why English Language?

It has been awhile since my last post. The reason why I hold myself from writing is due to the lacking of ideas and I have less ideas to express. I want to maintain the quality of work by having real content in my writing than just writing for the purpose of writing. Just want to make sure that my writing is worth reading, even a manual on how to build a rack has its purpose!

Let's get into the topic. The thing that I want to voice out today is regarding the decision of choosing English Language as my major in bachelor degree. For your information, I am currently having my internship in a private school. IT is different when you work in a school and in a corporate, the field is different, but the most important thing is that people in different field they have different kind of mindset with them. People in the school are mostly educators. Set aside of how much they made, they shared their mind on how to shape a better community by teaching and building the students well being and also their achievement in various performances. For them, the best revenue is knowledge.

In school, I had time where I spent with other teachers during the lunch break. They questioned about my major and why you choose English as your major. And of course, I explained my thoughts to them.

P.S. I used to be a science student.

First thing first, I do enjoy study science but there is limitation in it. It is okay for me to make science as part of my hobby and have my own research in this field. but there is a problem for me if I am going to make it my major. I found that I enjoy science better when I am studying it in a way that there is no academic stress on it.

Second, I like to observe how people talk and express themselves. To understand people in a better way, I need to understand the language that they use to express themselves. Understand the essence of the language and a heart with willingness to hear is the best way to understand what people are trying to say. The word expressed doesn't always mean the truth, by observing people you get to know the reason they are holding themselves back from expressing their heart. One, it might be due to the language problem, they are not sure about the word choice to use to construct a sentence that can express their feeling. Another reason will just be they wanna keep the truth with themselves but at the same time giving out the idea or concept.

These situations work when you are the audience, what if today you are the one who are going to do the speaking  and expressing job? Well, having the psychology of knowing how to speak the right thing at the right moment and a good command in language will ease your job VERY WELL.

An extension to the second point:
Other than knowing how to speak, one has to know how to write. Writing is the best way to express oneself. Don't you feel better when you are able to write your mind on a piece of paper or in your diary? You write to express, let people know what you are thinking about. You might inspire people with your writing! So if you have a good command of language, writing will come in handy. For me, I always hope that my work can bring laughter among people or at least broaden their mind by providing information. Everyone has their own style in writing and I encourage people to write to expand their knowledge and eventually they will get used to it.

These are plenty of my mind regarding the topic. Most importantly, try to express yourself by saying it out, or if not, write down your thoughts. Your mind always matter.  

The Unfortunate

Disclaimer: This post has nothing to do with A Series of Unfortunate Events and Neil Patrick Harris.

As mentioned in the title, I am going to talk about part of the unfortunate in my life in this particular post.

The 'unfortunate' that I am going to mention, I can't say it is a true unfortunate but it is considered as part of the unfortunate because I believe there are more unfortunates in this world. I am truly fortunate enough to have this life, good food, good life, good education, good family everything is fine for me. Part of the unfortunate of my life is not getting much friends, especially male friends in general. I do have male friends, just less.

And also, much and enough doesn't correspond in this post. I have just the enough and fine amount of friends in term of quality, but not in terms of quantity. It's not ashamed to have less friends but the amount of peers I have is just, inadequate.

I used to be in an all boy school during my secondary years. Chances of me knowing and recognizing male friends was certainly higher. But due to some issue, I didn't survive my high school years with bunch of friends. Interpersonal relationship is complicated, I believe everyone encounter it at least once in their life. End up having my life somehow incomplete because rumor has it, you have to graduate with bunch of friends so you get a life. (meh) After high school, I entered college and currently an English Major student.  (Don't question about what am I gonna do after I graduate, save it later.)

Apparently, there is not much male friends in this particular course I am taking. The ratio of female to male students in this particular course is 8:2. Yes, you're right, 8:2 and 2 is for male, seriously. It is a situation where I didn't even imagine before. Having so many years in secondary without a girl, and it changed completely after I entered college. In my mind, I was thinking when I entered college I am gonna be a freshman and be friends with all kind of people and have a gang of bros so we can slay the monsters or discuss about games all day and all night. Also, having to stay in cyber cafes and be a cyber kinda person in my college life with bunch of others gamer boys and stuff. (YOLO to some point at least, make your life worth)

Things didn't go quite well with what I expect. I end up knowing more about cosmetics and skincare and gossips more than games. I am not saying this is not good, at least I get to learn something from the counterpart of male friends. My college mates and I don't actually hang out. A no for yumcha (high tea) as most of my college mates seem to be having their own business to mind. I am keen to stay with a smaller circle so to be honest I don't have much friends in college too. I only workout with those their personality suits me better and we can work and live better. Even we have no time for yumcha or stuff, at least I can get my work done and I feel really soothed and calm to have a few mates who are willing to work together to produce quality work for assignments. So far so good so keep it up.

This wishlist maybe weird, but one of the wish on my wishlist is to have a gang of male friends that we could hang out all time and talk about life together. Aim for the future and see things together. Life may be easier and a lot nicer with a gang of  bros with chemistry and good rapport. Nevertheless, I enjoy my current life for having what I have now. It is a lot more fortunate than some others in this enormous world with all sorts of possibilities.

I appreciate everything in my life and I hope it can be better. Well, I welcome friends to come into my life. Just make sure less drama, that will do the job. Peace.

What is it like to have a sleepy girlfriend?

'Bii, I feel sleepy already.'
'I wanna sleep now.'
'I feel so tired now I can literally sleep if I close my eyes regardless where am I, or how I look. I can sleep even when I'm standing.'
'I am just so reluctant to move, can you help me to get up or carry me to bed?'
'Can I just skip my meal because I'm lazy to get up from bed  to get some food. Or can you deliver food to my bed?'
'I've been awake since 9am but I'm still in my bed and it's currently 12pm'

Well, basically those are the words that I can hear from my significant other part when I'm around her. Sometimes I feel funny when she says those words; sometimes I feel 'oh ma gawd' why is my cutiepie a lazy lady? But to be honest, that doesn't cause much problems to me. Watching her laying there and turning here and there is just a part of my life. Part of my leisure watching her turning here and there on the bed, sofa, chair, table and somewhere where it can be lean on lol.

How to deal with this problem when you found your gf has that kind of symptoms? Simple. It depends on how you gonna deal with it or just leave it there. For me, I will try to fulfill her request whenever she asks for something.
P.S. Well I did that all the time, it's fun, I take it as a kind of communication between us.

Whenever and wherever we go, the sleepy syndrome might follow and happen. I will tell a story about it, not the actual one but the possible situation where all these might happen. Well, someday we just decided to go for a walk around the neighborhood and here's the thing:

To travel to the one particular destination, it takes around 40 mins by car, I'm the chauffeur and she's my lady, sitting not at the back but the side of the car. It's noon time and we start our road trip and after 10 mins of drive she will start to show the signs where she starting to feel bored. (yes, we talk and communicate and laugh but sometimes we don't, and when there is no communication, sleepy syndrome will creep out) She will start to yawn, and yup, fall asleep within 2 mins to be exact. Until we reached or almost reach the destination she will automatically wake up and we got off from the car and start walking, for example, in a shopping complex. At arrival, usually she is quite excited about it, looking here and there for things inside the mall and stuff. The sleepy syndrome is still there but it will come out again once her energy has depleted. During the middle of walk and towards the end of walking in the mall or somewhere else, she can tell me she is tired and need some sleep, so we get some rest in the coffee shop nearby, sit down, order coffee and some food, refill our stamina and continue to walk. After all the walking session in mall, and done with shopping, we travel back home. And, the sleep goddess is here again.

Once she stepped in the car, she will start navigating using Waze. (sometimes I'm not familiar with the road so I need some navigation) But after 5 mins without communication (sometimes she is just too tired to talk then I won't initiate conversation) she falls asleep. The whole journey back home, I'm navigating myself by looking at the Waze on her phone on her hand, but she will be 'fishing' her head front and back, left and right. I enjoyed looking at her sleeping at some point that I think she is too cute to be a human. Sometimes I wonder, I drive and the road might not be always smooth and there might be some slight vibration, she managed to sleep until I drive her home. She will be like banging and spin her head around and around until she wakes up LOL. After she got home, she will lay on the sofa, once again, the sequence repeat lol.

I think a Koala might be the best animal to describe my gf's sleeping habit. She needs a lot of sleep even she slept well the night before or even she said she is energetic when she wake up.

Nevertheless all the sleeps, I won't say a thing but try to save her trouble by doing whatever I think it is necessary when she's asleep and when she wake up, she will be able to continue with what she left before she sleep.

A wise note for all the guys out there:

The more you dote your gf, the prettier she will be; The more sleep she gets, the happier she will be. So guys, let your gf sleep and dote her much much much. No wonder my girl is so damn fine all the time. Your life will be so much better with her smile. Let her proceed with her sleeping session, as an exchange for  her smile, that's worth :D

520

Knowing your imperfections, still choose you
Knowing your impatience once in a while, still choose you

Knowing that you need to be love and care with tender, so I choose you
Knowing that you need someone to comfort you when you're down, so I choose you
Knowing that you don't want to bother people by pushing yourself to the maximum, I am here to share the burdens
Knowing that you always keep things to yourself, I am here to listen to your thoughts

Knowing that you seldom talk about your mind, but actually showing it out in another way; the love and the care for animals you always giving out, is actually the same thing I want to give you. The love the care in the tender way, caress you with hand, understand you by heart, treat you like the way a girl should always be appreciate, love you and teach you to love yourself.

Spare me your time, mind and thoughts, let me understand you, I shall return you the shower of love.
Just for you to know, even when there is no one to love you, I am always here, loving you unconditionally.

You deserved to be love and cherish, my Pri-ncess.
Wish to see you smile and always happy go lucky.
Happy 520

聞

我不沾花惹草 因為我只想對她好

我不會單獨跟女生出去 因為我怕她不放心

我會自動跟其他女生保持距離 因為沒必要刻意靠近

我會時時刻刻關注她 哪怕只是打個噴嚏我都會擔心是不是受寒了

我不會過於約束 因為每個人都需要自己的空間

我不求付出會有回報 因為感情是互相的

我會擔心她 那是因為我會在意她

總結 我不會做讓她擔心的事

我只想安安靜靜的定下來

慢慢一起經營感情珍惜對方

感恩人生路上遇見你 我知道這很難得

害怕受傷但是遇見你了就想給彼此一個機會

互相磨合 互相遷就 互相學習

說的永遠不必做的來得好

能做的我會好好做 做不到的也會去爭取

我選的聞 我就會好好的愛下去

To care or not to care in relationship / long distance relationship

Recently I encountered some problems in life in some aspects. For academic aspect, it is going well and improvement can be seen so it shouldn't be a big problem now, I will just proceed with my work and work it out to ensure my result is maintained. And now I am proceeding to second year in University. Hope everything goes well and god bless me.

  The problem that I realized is that sometimes I care too much in certain aspect, for example, relationship. I can say I am a tender kind of personality that often prioritized the other half. I know it is not easy to meet the right one and eventually get together so I care a lot to ensure everything goes smooth. There is no problem with the relationship thing, just I realized that sometimes it is not too good to care too much.

  I realized the problem and I tried to overcome it and I came up with these few things.

  Don't overthink. This is a serious issue as people tend to overthink about what will happen next in life. One does not simply predict the future so one doesn't have to spend so much time to think about the unknown, live at the moment and eventually you will become more delight. Focus on your current work or job or chores and responsibility. Do what you always do and avoid the negative thoughts that you think it MIGHT happen. Having a plan is fine, just plain plan that will guide you to a clearer path, but not direct it to the overthinking path which will turn a normal person to a psychopath.

  Trust your partner and whatever they are doing. Since my partner is far apart from me where we are not living together for the mean time, I always try to practice some other kind of activities to prevent the overthinking situation from happening. Do not always make them your everything, all time every time. You live your life and you need to find something else to do, perhaps some exercises, gathering with friends, hanging out to catch a movie or even accompany your family members. Sometimes I do feel boring when I am too free but my partner is not available, and I got nothing to do. I miss her and I tell her every time, still you have to find something else to do. Make your life an interesting one, self-entertained and always share what you do when you spend your time alone. I am quite certain that your partner would want to know what you're up to when he or she is not around. Other than that, I am also certain that your partner did the same thing as well when you're not around. Spend your time wisely with your partner as long as they wanna have a chat, to make sure that both of you feel connected, mentally. And you will feel peace about everything. Tell them you love them and meet up and have a talk sometimes, to make the bond between you two closer.

  Well, it doesn't mean that I am telling you not to think about your partner, but try to balance it with your routine.

  It is hard to maintain a long distance relationship. Some people may encounter time difference as they live in different country. Plan for a trip that you fly to him or her just to meet her for a couple days or even weeks, just to keep him or her accompany. I bet those who are in a relationship, especially long distance relationship tend to be happier and glad when they finally meet their partner after a long time. So plan well and always communicate to let you feel you are still there. 

  But the most important criteria in all these cases is --- Trust. As long as you trusted your partner and your partner trusted you, it should be fine. Love will overcome problems as long as two of them managed and able to secure the path they are walking. Hence, a relationship can be maintain well and long lasting.

  I will be back when I got something to share. For now, I am gonna make my life interesting by looking for something else to do after I done typing here since my partner is not around. Oh ya by the way, I love you my cutiepie baby gf <3

2016年9月2號

不打算說很多 只想要把東西乾淨利落的說完就好

大概帶過就行了 雖然沒什麼時間但是還是想來更新這裡

首先 這個學期的確是個難熬的學期 功課非常之多基本上沒什麼時間

有時間也把時間放在別的中心上面了 比起以往的學期這學期真的煎熬

功課上面遇到了豬一般的隊友一直拖功課 導致精神狀況都不是很好了

畢竟要陪他們一起耗時間來完成工作 長達14個星期

現在總算是告一段落了 考試即將來臨也在努力的啃著書

相信我一定能做到 並且順利地往大二的路走

次要 雖然都在趕著做功課 也不忙聯繫一下身邊朋友建立社交圈
前幾篇發的文如果有在關注的人都會知道我提及了一位心理學的朋友
那剛認識的時候可能沒什麼反應 但是後來也沒人保證有什麼會發生事
就這樣化學作用起了效果 那位我稱之為‘cyninge’的朋友
現在變成了本人的女朋友 愛無界限我也沒料到
我們終於牽手了 接下來的路就繼續的好好走下去吧
感謝上天讓我遇見你

再來 最近壓力有點大 因為有太多東西要處理 大多屬於課業上的問題
得到的功課分數雖然不是說很高 就必須要努力的考好試了
我不怪罪于我的同學 也希望他們能夠考好來

只是個人修養與態度問題 希望他們能夠好好改善畢竟以後沒人會幫他善後
人際關係也是一門學問 我希望搞好這門學問才能夠向更遠的路邁進

大概就差不多是這樣了 月尾考完后就要去散心了

希望一切都能夠做好 身邊的人事物也都保持下去
唯獨自身目標必須不斷前進 才能有條件在社會上立足
要能夠獨當一面面對挑戰 才能夠變得更加強大

才能夠繼續做自己愛做的事 繼續愛自己愛的人與家人

  

Me Before You - review from Jack

“You only get one life. It's actually your duty to live it as fully as possible.” 
― Jojo Moyes, Me Before You

  This movie is a recent hot search title, on websites, social networks, and the whole internet is discussing about this particular movie, which is based on the novel, Me Before You by Jojo Moyes. Why is this movie such trending after it's released? We will see that later. Today I'm here to talk about my opinion about this movie.

  Two days ago, which is 3rd of June, I went for this movie not because of I really want to watch it. Since my friends are asking is there anybody want to watch it. For me, I don't actually fond of this kind of romance title movie as I'm a big fan of Marvel and DC superheroes movies, I prefer some action film rather than this genre of film range. Since I never read the novel before so I really don't have any idea on how is the storyline is going on and how is it going to act. I went in to the dark cinema with chilly air-conditioner, to enjoy the vibes that it exerts.

  About this particular movie, all I can say it's quite fascinating after I watched it and astonished at the same time. First of all, the last same line movie that I watched was 'The Fault In Our Stars' by John Green. Hazel Grace and Augustus Waters both suffer from severe cancer which end up dying. As for Will Traynor from this movie, well, I think he's kinda selfish if you view it from a third person point of view, as there are people around who care about him, he shouldn't just end his life like that, leave everything and left. Which this is what most people think of after they watched this movie.

  Try to stand at the point of view of Will's parents and Clark's, you might get a different idea from that. As parents, obviously you don't want your child to just pick a way which end up giving up their life, they tried to make him feel better and try to change his mind of committing suicide after the accident. Parent's will always care about their children no matter what, as parents we can't just let our child to end his life that easily as there are still hope out there, for them. As for Louisa Clark, she loves him deeply, like real much. She meant a lot to him and he meant a lot to her, mutualism I guess. But what Clark didn't realised is Traynor's feeling in the first place. Traynor used to be an outgoing adventurous person, he is a dreamer, adventurer who step out for everything, explore and do anything that he wants, freedom can be seen on him before that accident.

  After accident, that is a trauma for him, paralysed below neck part, end up he only get to speak but do nothing, sitting on the wheel chair for the rest of his life. It's a doomsday for him, as what he did before the accident were all past, he can't do it anymore in the rest of his life. The ownself that he meant he was is the old him, the freedom him. The current situation is like an end of his life, worse than killing him, giving him an ultimate punishment for his life. Standing at his point of view, indeed, it's a never ending nightmare, he suffers everyday just to get out of this mess but he can't. That's why he is so eager to die as he doesn't want to live a life like this.

  Overall experience for this movie is still quite good though, the story line showed some sense of humor between the conversation of two selves. The ending is, well, as expected, if you love something you have to let it go, that's what came into my mine right after I came out from the theatre.

  Depends on which side you're standing. If I were Will Traynor and I've met my Louisa Clark, I will still try to live until the day where I think it's enough, then only I will plan for the next step. But before that, I will try to live by her side as, if I love her, I will stay for her. Well, that's some pieces of opinion after this movie. See you guys in the next one. Peace.

What to do as a college freshman

 

Time flies, like the speed of light, travel at full speed and high speed without any hesitation of stop by and enjoy the scenery of light, ruthless and cruel. My fortnight semester break almost come to an end, gonna go back to campus by this weekend to clean up my room which is now maybe a nest for insects and an army of roaches. I'm gonna fight them like a warrior with my newly purchase pesticide to ensure my living environment is always clean and clear. An OCD guy will never allow dirty things to live inside his room, and that's me.

  Recently I've came across some status update about how am I going to survive my college life as a freshman. As an experienced, I will try to tell them what to do and some tips on surviving for the first few weeks. Two of my mum's friends got their daughter to enrolled in the foundation program in UTAR as well, as a senior I've told one of them what to do but basically what I do is to be a delivery man to deliver their parcel from their parents as now they're already in the campus for the orientation activity for a week. So now I will brief some of the way to survive in the first few weeks of college life.

  As a freshmen in college university, I got some tips on how to survive the first few weeks in college, that will be enroll in all kinds of activity that the college offers, try to reach as many people as you can and explore the surrounding of campus with certain basic knowledge of campus itself.

 When you're in a new place, especially when you're travelling far from you hometown to study alone in an all new place which is not familiar to you. Some of them may come from different state or even other country alone and the first problem they will face is shyness and awkwardness in talking to people. Well, you might feel it's kinda weird but DON'T HESITATE to talk to people or the staff if you have any problems. People are usually kind and some of them might have the same problem as you, struggling of finding someone to talk. So why not take a step forward and make friends and be nice to other people? Who knows if you guys will get along well later on. I strongly suggest those freshmen to attend the orientation week organised by the campus authority to let you get to know the place and the culture as well as the people around the place, to make it familiar to yourself.

  The second problem will be people will be having homesickness since they are away from their family, the people that they are familiar with, their normal peers and friends are not there for them. Sure they will be nervous about that. Some might be facing problems like having symptoms of nausea or health problems due to stress to leave your hometown to travel far. It's okay to cry, try to confess it to your family or friends or counselors, they will give you advise and tell you what to do. Distract your attention of homesickness by making new friends in the new area to broaden your social circle, mix with friends with a certain hobby and join clubs societies in campus to ensure your college life is meaningful. I wouldn't suggest you to sit in your room whole day but if you have roommate with you, might as well making friends with them first at the first step and they will lead you if they are seniors with experiences.

  Be outgoing, try to exercise or go to gym to work out to free your body and mind. I'm quite certain that you can meet somebody new also when you hit the gym or exercise near the garden nearby, talk to people and be nice with them. Concentrate on mind building and physical body building, academically and physically. That will help a lot in distract you from being stressful to a new place.

Well, I guess these are some basic thing you can refer to if you're facing the same problem during new intake of college. I will come back with another post later, peace.

Semester's challenge

 Finals week is here. The coffee game is kinda strong for these few weeks as I'm staying up for late night studies. UTAR finals ain't easy, so gotta work hard for that. Study, study and study, that's all I need to do for now. Enjoy the shit fun after the finals. Even if it is an essay written form paper will get me nervous. I'm an English major but I take this seriously as it will certainly affect my future studies and of course my CGPA until the day I graduate.

  I'm glad that I'm still able to socialize within these exam weeks as socializing in Uni life is a crucial part as stepping stones to success. You meet new people all the time, and sometimes you get along with them, It starts with having mutual respect with others by having conversation and conduct activities together. You wouldn't know maybe you will be needing their help in the future, so its about time to build your own bridge to success for your future by get to know some people around you, get to know what their achievements are and then learn from it, get the experience and excel.

  Apparently, my social circle is getting bigger and bigger as semester passes. I get to know people from other courses or even people from the other faculties, which is good for me as I'm able to understand others life as well and get acknowledge. For example, the psychology student, who I call her a 'cyninge' (Old English), is a good girl and a good friend. She's going to have her internship next semester so she will not be around for the whole semester. As a friend I wish her good luck in every aspects and come back soon, I'm eager to get to know her more and advance our friendship, erm, I actually mean STRENGTHEN it. Anyway, she's cute haha.

  Improving myself is also a challenge for myself in this three years, to become a better person and learn how to make myself a better self. For academic studies, I'm still improving my skills in writing and typing a better essay or article, proofreading peoples assignments and read more articles and novels. As for mentally, I relax being a student and I do socialize a lot than before, so it is much better now as your mind broaden, you learn, you will eventually change the way you think and solving problems, that's the way to improve yourself.

  Alright, I still have finals paper to deal tomorrow and I'm suppose to sleep now. All the best for the coming papers and wish y'all have a good day or night. Will get back here to work soon.

Rush hour

Second semester in University, currently end of week 10, proceeding to week 11. Working out, not in the gym but in the library and my room, preferred to study alone than group study as I think working alone is the best way for me. I don't hate group assignments but sometimes I just think it's just not necessary. I'm a lone worker which prefer to work alone with my cup of coffee, jazz music and overload workload.

Not sure what's going on with the course structure but it seems to stack everything at the end of the semester. Week 14 will be the last week of lecture week and finals start at Week 15. Too bad I don't have much time left to deal with all those stuff that I need to do. 4 oral presentations left, 3 assignments yet to be submit, corrections for assignments still under progress, and lecturers that just won't appreciate your hard work by stabbing you about how bad you did for your draft. Being a University student is not easy though, we have to deal with a lot of things, intrapersonal to interpersonal and to the whole community. Yet we don't have a study week policy my current university. How bad it is.

Typing stuff here is a getaway for me to chill and relax for a few moment before I proceed with my works. I don't Netflix and chill as I don't really feel chill with this kind of weather over here in my country, it's freaking 38 degree celsius, yes it's 38 degree celsius, not fahrenheit. No kidding. Literally will melt when you walk under the sun. The second point is that I feel guilty if I really go Netflix and chill as lotzof work are still waiting for me, doing nothing but chilling makes me dying. The third point will be, 'netflix and chill', I got nobody to 'chill' with, 21 and still a virgin makes me wanna laugh sometimes LOL

Typing job is fun, but not typing assignments or script for presentations. That will be sick. One and a half month more to go, to sem break. There will be two weeks of sembreak for us, not even an easterbreak or summerbreak. Just fortnight break. Well played Uni, well played.

I guess I will need to focus on current work and do well in preparing for my final.  Hope I'm able to cope with everything and go back to hometown quickly. I'm gonna get some food now, see ya peeps.

Relationship kinda thing

 

Not sure if I'm having a topic with me, I just feel like to update this blog at this hour. Well, without a topic is really hard to start a conversation and a blog post. At least, a topic for me to talk about anything, I'd really just talk about anything. Currently I am having that kind of feeling which I wish to express myself again but I don't know how to express it, it's like having butterflies in my head but not my stomach. Just ughhhh.

  After I finished my first paragraph, I kinda got an idea on what to write. Just have some decent conversation with my friends in the basketball field at this hour and I kinda recalled what happened back then. So, I'll just make the title of this post as relationship, which is a thing that everyone in this world has it. So basically it's the bond that you hold with someone else, no matter how shallow or how deep the relationship is, it's call a relationship even your nemesis, just that kind of nemesis relationship, still considered as relationship.

  This is not going to be a long post as I feel so vague in talking about relationships. It's complicated. Definitely there will be some kind of argument in every relationships no matter it's kinship, friendship, broship, sisship, romance or something else, it's a relationship. I'm not going that deep talking about this topic as I'm still an amateur, especially the romance part. The last one just hurt me so damn much which I barely stand that time. And yeah, I cried of course. Such remarkable incident that I actually cried for a girl which is not even my family member and will never be, how pathetic.

  So I am just going to sums up the whole thing by using only one sentence,

  I will go on for a relationship when the time has come, today is 8th of March in 2016, I'm still not ready for the next one yet, thanks to the last one which was so 刻骨铭心 for me which I recalled it during the conversation. And probably she's living with happiness right now, with another part that was told he will never appear until she thinks the time has come, and I think the time for her has come. Congrats anyway. And, ya, you influenced my life, like so much.

  What a long sentence I have with me, that's all. If you insist me to sums up the whole thing using one word, this will be the word.

  Insecure.

Lost stars

 On the journey of being a humankind, from the moment you were born, you're registered as a runner for life. From the beginning until the end; from live to death, there will be a never ending journey until the day your heart stop functioning. Well, it's not really a long marathon without stops in between. Many factors can make us to stop or proceed to the next level of the run of your life. Your result in the end depends on the actions and steps you take to reach the next level, different steps or actions may lead to different results. You are responsible for your own preference.

  Since young, you were taught to learn this and that, adapt what a life would be and hence make it better. Parents guide you until the level where you are able to do things on your own, they play an important role in deciding what your life would be in the future. Since young, you're taught to play your role good, do according to instructions, spoon-feeding educations and here comes the real challenge - Adulthood.

  What's so different with adulthood? Maybe for insects, it's considered as metamorphosis. Maybe for humankind, it's a transformation from everything dependent to everything independent, sounds hard for particular people but adapting yourself into this new world full of challenge is a huge challenge indeed. Everything changed the moment you leave your nest, your home, your hometown, your parents or maybe your so called 'boyfriends or girlfriends'. The phrase Live Your Life has never been so real until you started to experience it yourself after you leave.

  On the journey, you will meet a lot of people, been to a lot of places no matter how prestigious or how insignificant it is. You explore the life in front of you by yourself, find the true self of you, the inner part of you, and learn how to be a better self. On this journey, you can be inspired by people, by their personal experiences, their past stories and also all kind of comments. Meeting new people ain't that bad, you just have to adjust yourself to fit in it. Humans are inertial animal, so you just have to change yourself in order to survive. It might be hard at the start but eventually you will know what to do and how to deal with problems. Always be optimistic and inspired. Encouragements from others are good though, making a positive image for those who need.

  Sometimes, you feel lost, you don't have a direction, you're insecure, you're not sure which way to march in and continue your journey. At this moment, don't ever stop exploring, don't stop your journey because you're stuck. Take whatever way to continue your journey cause you don't know what will happen next and where the way will lead you to. A lot of people stop at this point because they scare they will fall, and once fall they consider themselves as failure and thus given up. That's really not the real way of life. Life is about testing out new things, exploring your life so you are able to find the real way that suits you the best and continue with the journey that you desired. That's the way of making it out, face the problems not frigging run away from it. Escaping will not get the problem done and sometimes it make it worse. Just work it out when you're lost, eventually you will found something that's worth all the time you spent on it.

  It's okay to have a stop when you're tired but never give up. Giving up in life means end, death. Remember why you start and why God chose you as a participant- to make you a better person. Life is like a drawing block, you are the artist and you design your masterpiece. Change to a new environment when you feel like to, be flexible, human are meant to be creative and not to live in a dull way. Be creative, you create your own life. Changing an environment will always lead you to a new way of living your life and creating yourself on who you are. Just keep that in mind.

  Always remember, stay positive, explore the life yourself and keep changing until you find the best way to live your life. Don't ever give up on life cause God trusted you. Find yourself in the journey of life, not just living like walking dead. Find yourself, get a life, change until you find the best in you.

Inspired by : J.Y. Chin

Expectation

 


 Expectation meant to be something you want yourself or just someone wants you achieve as they think you are capable of doing it, to meet the requirement of certain rank in some random field. Expectations has bias in someway that it shouldn't be, overly having high expectation on someone will only lead to disappointment. People with high self esteem, when they didn't meet their own expectation one day, they will feel depressed over it and someone will choose to end it with their own way and also the worst way, kill yourself.

  Nowadays, parents having high expectations to their children as we can see. Children are taught to be understand certain things and rules, for example, they must at least achieve some sort of achievement in school, for getting an A in certain subjects and maybe some coursework. A difference that can be seen is, western families may have difference perspective compared to asian families. For those, who grew up in an asian family, most of you know what is THAT level of expectation.

  I, grew up in a typical asian-chinese family. Parents always have expectations on their children, no matter what kind of age it is. A child will be impose on how important is it for you to get yourself a higher rank and good results in exam and school where they just impose it on their children like it is an instinct. From what I know, most of the western family (I said MOST of them) will just encourage their children to do better as they've tried their best, as for asian family (MOST of them again), parents tend to tell you what to do and follow their way of life, because that's the way they live, they want you to be the same as them.

  The reason why parents have such expectations from their children, probably due to they themselves are professionals in the level of society, so they want their descendants to follow their footsteps to become 'someone like them'. As for another reason, probably they just want their children to do well so that they can have that crucial criteria to brag with their friends and peers what a genius child I have, I'm so talent to guide and teach to have such a talented children, basically showing off purpose. So that they can earn probably some esteem that doesn't really mean much to the others. Asians don't like the feeling of being a loser, everybody is so damn 'kiasu' (afraid of being a loser).

  I hope parents don't expect too much from their children. They have the right to live the life that they prefer, not to be your puppet. Excessive expectations lead to disappointment, don't regret when the thing you really cherish has gone.

  Pursuing for abstract feeling of being an upper class doesn't make your life better, trust me.

  Parents please parents.

Behold, the power of coffee! End semester.

It's been awhile since my last update, a month and some days. Not gonna sums up the first semester in University since the answer would be quite boring as expected. Uni/college life, if I really need to sums up all in one word for the first semester, I would say: fine.

Since it's the first semester and not much actually happened, go to school, back from school, sleep, eat, assignments, presentation and so on. Probably already adapted to this kind of life and I have to maintain it consistently for 3 years, great.

Final is coming next week and I'm almost done with my revision, just need some more extra tutorials exercises, then for the rest just depends on what I've learnt and general knowledge, God bless me. May my days be short, night be short, finals be easy, and my coffee be strong. After finals will be a one month semester break, and Christmas. Still have no ideas on what to do and where to go during Christmas but most probably will just stay at home hitting the button on laptop and scream and yell while pwning some people's head over Dota 2. Hell yeah.

I've spent quite a lot of money this semester on some personal belongings, gadgets, and furniture for my new room and for myself. Some frizzy and chips for free time, and most of the money on food. Being a food hunter is not easy though, you need to have some modal before you grab you bites from a new place, where you need to discover yourself on food, whether it's yay or nay.

After next week, I'll be at home. Will update if there's any event coming on and hopefully I get to know where to shopping or hangout during Xmas.

Single bell, single bell, single all the way. Happy Singles 1st year Anniversary. Thanks ex.

Day 7 in UTAR

  As I mentioned in the title, day 7 in University Tunku Abdul Rahman (UTAR). Everything just fine and went smoothly within the past week. Recently I'm quite busy with some chores so I don't really have time to update this little blog. Since I'm here and today is weekend, other than having to deal with assignments, I've decided to spare some time to update this blog for reference purpose, as get stuck in between assignments and homework is boring. To refresh my mind before I start to do my work again , this place is a good getaway for me.

  First of all, the campus is gorgeous, as the scenery in this campus is quite fascinating. As I don't really took photos of the campus so I will just borrow some of photos from Google below later. The weather here is freakish, 5 mins before the sun is shiny and freaking hot, 5 mins later you can see heavy downpour just happen right in front of you. So umbrella is an essential tool with me to deal with this kind of weather that can instantly kill somebody who is not used to it. Too frustrated.

Here are some landscape of the campus (pictures resource www.google.com, I don't owned those photos):

GRAND HALL OF UTAR KAMPAR (1)

GRAND HALL OF UTAR KAMPAR (2)

GRAND HALL OF UTAR KAMPAR (3) SIDE VIEW




GRAND HALL OF UTAR KAMPAR (4) SIDE VIEW





FACULTY OF ARTS & SOCIAL SCIENCE, FICT, INSTITUTE OF CHINESE STUDIES





LIBRARY (BLOCK G)

HERITAGE HALL (BLOCK A)




HERITAGE HALL WITH CONFUCIUS AND ALBERT EINSTEIN STATUE





WEST LAKE




LAKE OF UTAR KAMPAR, SURROUNDING

  These photos are some of the landscape and scenery around the campus though there are still much more buildings around the campus. Anyway, the scenery here for me is quite good. Mountains and hills and lakes. A decent place for study.

  As for the workload in campus, still yet to be discover and it's still the first week. I'm still adapting to the culture here and the way people living here. Basically this area doesn't have much entertainment and if you're from urban area and let's say if you are a party animal or social freak I assume that you won't like this place as there is no shopping malls or pubs or clubs nearby. The nearest located near Ipoh which will take around 1 hour of driving to reach there, which I think still quite some distance from the campus. But eventually you will use to this place.

  Assignments and coursework are provided and you have to do it and probably for all the students here. Rumors from local students are heard that it's a University that is easy to enter but require efforts to graduate. So all the best for all the students here and hope you can excel as well as finding your way of life here.

  There are old town and new town which is significant for newly intake students to take note. Both the towns with their own styles. Literally, old town, old building that somewhat resemblance old decades with all kinds of old shop and perhaps a wet market. Too bad I don't have photos to provide because I haven't visit the whole town yet. A town that you will find nostalgia in it. As for new town, literally new town with lots of shops and supermarket and sports complex and all kinds of buildings including The Grand Kampar Hotel, student hostel, housing area, local secondary school and also Westlake International School. Waiting for you to discover yourself.

WESTLAKE INTERNATIONAL SCHOOL

THE GRAND KAMPAR HOTEL

  Anyway, it's a new place to discover. Neither a luxurious nor austere town, just average. I would recommend this place if you're searching for a tranquil place to continue your studies. A choice of yours, it depends on yourself. Different universities has different policies. These are just my opinions and it's just for reference purpose. Lastly, I hope I can cope with it. Best of luck to myself and it's time to head back to do my assignments.



Peace guys, see you in the next one.

New life

  Years ago I was wondering about the years in future that I would have to do all the things by myself and live alone in either a big cage of a city or somewhat an off urban area where I conduct my own works or studies without my family and friends. Seems like the situation is just about to happen where I have to leave my nest, start a new life out there which I could really start a new chapter of my life where I write my own life on my notebook. But just before it happens, I want to say something about that life that is just around the corner to me.

  The country where I live, the education system is something like this :

Pre-school : 4-6 year old
Primary school : 7-12 year old
Secondary plus Highschool : 13-17 year old (age differs for everyone, for me it's this)

another extra part of highschool (which is consider as pre-university, there are still different path to pursue studies)

  The moment that I was back in the pre-university part, I was expecting to get a brand new life there as the result and the life from past secondary years wont be take in as a part of the pre-u session. But then I realized that I was wrong. The definition of starting a brand new life is to be in a new environment with new challenges. I met new challenges but not a new environment. Environment is truly a challenge to most of the people as people normally make decisions depends on the current situation, not always the best solution but certainly useful and help for the current situation.

  The difference between starting a new life after you're release from the jail for committed some crimes and maybe after 5 years you are release and starting a new life in university with nobody else beside you, neither family nor friends, just you alone on your own is that, coming out from jail people will automatically place u a tag of "bad guy", i mean most of the people out there, and for a university newbie it's just a place where u are there, meeting new friends and environment, adapt that situations and live yourself there (the availability of friends differs from person, don't get friendzoned)

  So for those freshmen in university or college, try to adapt the situation there and walk yourself out of the comfort zone that you used to be. Happy go lucky and have a wonderful life. Peace.

自己 是什麼樣子

人生短短 說長不長 硬要坳也就那幾十年 幸運的話勤勞保養也不過就百歲已經很不錯了。常常聽別人說要成為自己想要成為的人 做想要做的事 小時候在記事本里填寫著以後長大要做這個那個。覺得警察很帥抓壞人 所以要做做警察 覺得醫生很有愛心可以救人 所以要做醫生 覺得軍人很忠心保衛國家 所以要做軍人 覺得什麼事情只要是長大都能夠完成 但逐漸的發現 長得越大越想要挽回小時候那天真的時光 不會有人去在意你做什麼說什麼 到處都是人陪你 帶你一起成長。

  漸漸地 我長大了 老大不小的二十了。夏天尾巴秋天開頭 年末了 來臨的幾個月後就要二十一了。小時候覺得長大好好 做什麼都沒拘束 要幹嘛就幹嘛 父母不會來煩你 鬧你 問東問西；長大後離家 想念的卻是父母的嘮叨 父母在身邊 能夠與手足一起鬧 那些時光其實很短暫 趁早珍惜能夠享受的一切吧 孝道也要盡 不要子欲養而親不待。

  越是大覺得越難做人 越孤獨。中學生涯有一群打打鬧鬧的朋友 一起逃課一起鬧一起吃喝玩樂 友好的一起吃 壞的一起挺。畢業後各奔東西 你忙你的我忙我的 你去北邊的大學 我去南邊的大學 他去東邊而他西邊 也不知道下一次見面是什麼時候 雖然想念他們但不會常常聯絡 因為我們都知道彼此都在罩著彼此不管身在何處 心都是一起的。然而 面對的困難不只對外要應酬 漸漸的發覺 失去了自己。小時候說什麼做什麼的自己 不見了。

  最難的是就是成為自己喜歡的樣子 但其實很多時候 我們都不知道自己其實是什麼樣子 那才是真正的問題。偶爾會聽見別人問你 以後要做什麼 相信大多數人的反應應該是 不知道 不清楚 不曉得 。如果是在我這個年齡層還在上大學的朋友們 我是說大多數 就覺得是這樣 沒做過什麼調查  就憑感覺認為是這樣。根據自己的觀察得到的結果是 自己越來越沉默寡言 除了跟平時友好的幾個瘋子朋友之外 都不怎麼想去面對外面的人 不是因為覺得陌生什麼 就是覺得現階段還沒必要去應酬這個那個 而且讀書都忙個半死了 哪還有時間精力去外面跟陌生人打聲招呼說聲好 累都累爆了。除了表示孤獨以外 學習堅強也是必備的了 自己在外面生活不會比在家裡來的幸福。慵懶的態度也該收手了。

  寫這篇文章並不會讓自己心情變好 就是抒發的管道。抒發過程中也要找尋自己想要的是什麼 想要變成什麼樣子 然後努力去實踐 不管最後結果如何。累了就休息 好了再繼續走 找不到方向的話就思考。腦是生來用的 不是放著生鏽的。

  路還很長 還得繼續走。期待下一站 會有著什麼樣的風景 等著自己去探索。

Youtuber or not? Planning phase.

  Recently I'm just too free that anything comes into my mind somewhat turns into an idea. So recently I really addict on watching random videos on Youtube, from my favourite youtuber - Pewdiepie and also some others channels that often do tech videos as I am really into it and fond of it. Wondering if someday I got my own youtube channel (actually I owned one now) and my own subscribers, that would be fun. Well, it's still on planning phase as I have to reconsider about it and also at least need to acquire some video taking basic skills before I get all these things start, kind of exciting huh heheheh hahahah :D

  Well I don't own any quality device as I don't always take selfies and taking videos around due to don't have that kind of habit which I think I need to consider making it as habit if I really wish to start on my own youtube channel. No quality devices which are over my budget, some decent devices should be okay for this kind of project from the start.

  Devices are needed but for me I think the most important point is the basic skills of taking videos, making videos and editing it. Editing it through apple devices can easily be done by using IMovies (my thought) and some other third party apps as well. Furthermore, for better presentation skills, I've been practicing talking to myself and to the mirror as well for years (not a freak okay) for a better speaking skills and also the brave heart to speak in front of others, as well as in front of cameras. Real challenge bros.

  Apparently, everything are still in planning phase, so maybe I'll do it or I won't because it needs a lot of time and energy doing it. Dedications are needed and I need partnerships to do these stuffs. I hope I have time to deal with it. As for this blog, I will still continue to update it as long as I have time to do so. It's mostly about my life and I shared it and tell it, no matter are there people reading these.

  Experienced something and share with me and I will share any other interesting things with you guys if there is any. Peace!!

Basically just upset

 


One and a half month from now, I will be going to pursue my uni life. Seems long but not really, the day will be there with just a blink of eyes. Time flies, I'm almost adult. Things that you learnt from the past not really help in the future but somewhat some kind of situation, it helps. So, I'm going to learn from now, prepare from now on how to take good care of myself, discipline myself well, train myself well before I enter University ; a place that I call it 'pre-society'.

  Ever since the first day you're born, your family baby sit you until the age of teenager. Then you continue your life until the end of your life. Not being too pessimism, you are going to find the way of life by yourself alone because nobody will help you to continue your life journey. Always, cherish the moment you have with your family while you still have the time to do so before it's too late, no matter what kind of situation you have, always cherish them because they are the one only who will support you no matter what, as blood is thicker than water.

  Life's hard sometimes and you just have to bear it. Uni life ain't easy, so do society. Just make sure that you get your job done and don't get yourself in trouble. No matter how busy you are with your work or study, have a break. Rest and always remember to contact your friends and family, get yourself some time to chill with them, because they are one of a kind, the most important part of your life.

  Always, when you're stress out and having tension, relax at the moment, enjoy the moment of silence and remember the one you miss, your family, your friends, peeps. Call them and talk to them, you will feel better. As family is always your life support, guide of life.